Losing Face

Servers give good face. Most of the time. We're trained to be disingenuous. We smile when we're not happy, we thank people when we're not grateful, and we apologize when we've done nothing wrong. We're drones of the industry. We recommend the most expensive items, we use unnatural language, we respond to the slave names waiter and waitress.

The industry rewards those who can fake it, those who can up sell and those who can turn their brains off. Most of us run on autopilot. We clock in and tune out. Entire days pass with little recollection. One shift is the same as the next and over time we forget mostly everything but regulars and liquor prices.

I have to admit it goes against my nature to do many of these things, and I'm not always successful. Yes I can sell, i can sell a pork chop to an anorexic vegan. But I can't always smile at someone who is rude. I get frustrated by people, coworkers, impossible situations.

I'm no stranger to being set up to fail. I work in a place that frequently operates without bus boys, a hostess, glassware, 30% of the items on the menu and adequate servers. The term in the weeds doesn't even adequately describe it. We take on 40+ covers. We make our own drinks sometimes. We have the manager run our food and even take orders for us.

I am a person who needs order to function. I don't deal well with anarchy. I want people orderly, sitting down and I want them to spend approximately $46.00 a cover. I lost it last night. The manager cut our other server just as a party of 35 came in, a party that wanted individual tabs. Then five, three and two twos came in. Cue sweat. Cue meltdown.

Even people who are just trying to be helpful end up just confusing matters more. Four people all ring in things under my number and take orders for tables I hadn't even greeted.

Then after neglecting all of my other tables for this big group they all just end up ordering from the bar after half of them started tabs with me. And I just lost it. It's like watching someone pluck money out of your pocket dollar by dollar. It's not entirely the bartender's fault, it's mostly the manager that basically dedicated me to this party in a room next to the bar without any real thought whatsoever. Of course I was going to get screwed out of it. It's easier for the bartender to just make drinks directly and manage all those individual covers. But the fact that I was just supposed to sit back and watch someone else make all of the money was infuriating.

If any real planning had gone into it the group would have been the bar's from the start and I could have just focused on my tables. But, of course that is a decision that would have taken some thought and consideration-- not the usual fly by the seat of our pants do whatever the guest wants without any planning or foresight. I'm sad to say the latter is our M.O. most days. And making money isn't as much a reward for hard work but a crapshoot often in favor of the greedy.

So yep, I probably shouldn't have lost my temper on the floor and yelled at every person but the dishwasher but I wonder sometimes if it's ever going to get better. After a year shouldn't we have it together? Can't we just run smoothly where everyone is happy and making money? Or will we always have to get by pickpocketing covers from other people?